While I am shivering in the cold at Toomler waiting for the doors to open, another early bird enters the scene. I tell her a friendly hello but my smile freezes firmly on my face when my eye sets upon her handbag. This because it's a bit impolite to friendly greet a stranger to then gawk at her with a horrified glare. It confuses people. Besides, I have a good 10 minutes of waiting with her yet to come. I nod, to give my smile some oomph. The bag is no ordinary bag; it's a fox.
My face is in an extreme conflict. My smile suggests: "Aw. How very lovely!" My eyes scream: "Is that my most favorite animal!!!!? Shot!? Skinned, head to toe to be artistically folded in double to create.... a handbag!!!??"
She sits down next to me. The fox doesn't have those stuffed-fox eyes, but those small beady eyes like on a teddy bear. This gives me a spark of hope. Maybe it's like those scary fake cats you sometimes come across at a market. I am silent for a bit longer, but cannot resist my curiosity.
"So..." I clear my throat a little bit, to be able to toss it in there as nonchalant and polite as possible. "Is that a-uhm- a real fox?" -"Yes." "Awn!" It comes flying out of my mouth before I know it. I make an exaggerated pout, to mellow it down a little, but it's already too late.
-"Oh no! You are not one of those, are you?" "Oh neu-neu-neu-no. HA HA HA!" -"That's a relief!"
Somewhere deep inside the true Claartje starts bawling in a very pitiful manner. Violins ascent.
"I've left my spray can at home today. HA HA HA." -"They shoot them anyway when there are too many of them, you know."
I take another look at the fox..
"I uhm -It's -It is just my absolute favorite animal. That's all."
I stare at my shoes, a bit embarrassed. I don't believe it's still socially acceptable to utter the phrase 'is my absolute favorite animal' when you are 27 years old. 'Used to be my absolute favorite animal. Back when I was 7.' That's fine. But 'is my absolute favorite animal' in present tense? Unacceptable! Still, dear people, THE FOX! IS!!!! MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE ANIMAL!! There. That's refreshing.
-"My daughter thinks it's so cute!" "Oh, does she?" -"Oh well. I simply love fur."
We wait in silence till the register opens. I glance at her fur collar and her fur boots every once in a while. She's PETA's nightmare. Oh well. She simply loves fur. And I'm apparently too polite to be an extreme animal rights activist. Pity. It was such an opportunity! Sorry, Foxy.
